"The Dumplings Ruined the Deal"

I didn't know about the botched merger between China's Nissin Foods and Japan Tobacco--you may have missed it too. A batch of poisonous Nissin dumplings hit the supermarkets of Japan and started making people sick as the would-be deal was nearly sealed. Nissin's misfortune came at a point when most consumables from China were considered suspect simply because of their origin. Nissin denied any fault on their end, even as ten Japanese people found themselves near death at the dumplings' doughy, little hands.

I bring this up because gross dumplings ruined a great merger today, too. Delicious broccoli, carrot and onion did not get along with curried split peas with tomato nearly as well as anticipated. The culprit was a late addition to the menu, a "vegetable, pork and mushroom" dumpling that tasted like fish.

If I'm dead tomorrow, look in the freezer for the red bag held shut with a clothespin. They'll probably deny, deny, deny. You guys can have all my stuff. Tell my mother I loved her.

For the full scoop on the dumpling scandal, click here.